From 59232e39c611dd29e035f4a0f4698667b0fef7f3 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Paul Buetow Date: Fri, 27 Jun 2025 17:18:50 +0300 Subject: med for mortals --- notes/index.html | 1 + notes/meditation-for-mortals.html | 170 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 2 files changed, 171 insertions(+) create mode 100644 notes/meditation-for-mortals.html (limited to 'notes') diff --git a/notes/index.html b/notes/index.html index fef4aa83..f6671dcb 100644 --- a/notes/index.html +++ b/notes/index.html @@ -28,6 +28,7 @@ 'Never split the difference' book notes
'Mind Management' book notes
'Mental Combat' book notes
+'Meditation for Mortals' book notes
'Love People, Use Things' book notes
'Joy On Domand' book notes
'Influence without Authority' book notes
diff --git a/notes/meditation-for-mortals.html b/notes/meditation-for-mortals.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6bd898d2 --- /dev/null +++ b/notes/meditation-for-mortals.html @@ -0,0 +1,170 @@ + + + + +'Meditation for Mortals' book notes + + + + + + +

"Meditation for Mortals" book notes

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"Meditation for Mortals" book notes
⇢ Self-Acceptance and Embracing Imperfection
⇢ Productivity, Accomplishment, and Focus
⇢ Information and Media Consumption
⇢ Dealing with Worry and Uncertainty
⇢ Action and Completion
⇢ Work, Focus, and Limits
⇢ Attitude Toward Problems and Challenges
⇢ Simplicity and Overcomplication
⇢ Interactions with Others and Emotional Boundaries
⇢ Dealing With Interruptions
⇢ Living in the Present and Deferred Gratification
⇢ Operating from Sanity and Mentoring
⇢ Letting Go

Self-Acceptance and Embracing Imperfection

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It is easier to try to be a better version of who you are than to try to be someone else.
Liberating yourself from wanting to resolve the most difficult things may be impossible; instead, accept who you are, with all your flaws.
Embrace imperfectionism.
Imperfectionism is good news. Accept life with its tough choices and non-perfect standards. Give up the unwinnable struggle to do everything perfectly.
Start to enjoy life now, which is the only time there is.
Real wisdom is not about having figured out everything; it is knowing that you never will.
If you stop trying to figure out and think about everything, you will have more time and energy to do what you are capable of.
Accepting that some parts of you or your surroundings will never change can be extremely liberating. Put down that burden, and embrace reality with a peaceful mind.
You do not have to try to get even more out of every event or thing. Live them fully rather than trying to collect memories.
Nothing ever done required superhuman capabilities. The difference between people who accomplish great things and those who don't is that the former don't care about not knowing everything. They are not less finite or limited.

Productivity, Accomplishment, and Focus

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The productivity trap: Responding to emails quickly, for example, just causes you to receive even more emails, as people consider it worthwhile to email you. This takes away time from what really matters.
We always try to optimize ourselves in every aspect. The hyper-competitive economy makes us feel like we have to.
We think we need to get to a "better life," but this place will never actually be reached.
You will never be in full control or get on top of everything. There is no magic trick.
The day will never come when all obstacles are gone; that's when true, meaningful life can begin.
Life as a human being is limited, with finite time and finite possibilities.
If you just follow systems and only do what you feel like in the moment, you will get stuck in a never-ending cycle of productivity and accomplishment. For example, don't postpone becoming a meditator—just start now with five minutes and meditate. Don't turn it into a long-term project, and be certain that doing it imperfectly is good enough.
You don't have to hit every deadline. You are pretty much free to do what you want; you just have to accept the consequences. Nothing stops you from doing anything, as long as you are willing to pay the price—even quitting your job without a backup plan.
There are no solutions, only choices. There are always trade-offs, and you have to choose the best one.
Many feel the need to achieve something in order to have the right to be where they are—the "productivity debt" mindset: having to work through an artificial debt every day. You have permission not to care. You don't have to be an insecure overachiever.
Some people only feel valued if they overachieve.
The endless feeling of "falling behind"… You won't be able to relax until the end of life if you live like this.
Do more of what matters to you.

Information and Media Consumption

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Too much information—information overload. There's far too much to read. Speed-reading, fast-forwarding, and filling every nanosecond won't help. You will only feel more stressed.
Treat your reading backlog as a river, not as an unending bucket.
You don't have a moral obligation to deal with all the magazines or books you have.
Reading books and magazines is not just about retaining facts, but about how they change you. Every book claims benefits, even if you don't remember what was inside. You don't have to take notes all the time.
Read not only to gather facts or knowledge but also for fun and interest.
You can't care about everything. Don't live inside the news.

Dealing with Worry and Uncertainty

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Anything can happen at any time. For example, someone could die unexpectedly. We cross that bridge when we come to it. Never rule out the possibility of awful things happening.
Worry is the only way to resist, but it won't help. We can't possibly think about everything that may happen in the future, and we strip the present of its calm when we worry about the future.
Worrying was useful in the Stone Age but is less so now.
Marcus Aurelius: "Never let the future disturb you."
Save energy by not worrying about the future; use that energy when the time comes to act.
You can still plan for the future; do it, but then don't dwell on it.
Our desire for controllability backfires in our quest for happiness. The more we try to make life controllable, the more we delude ourselves. If everything were controlled, life would be cold and uninteresting.
Life is semi-controllable, not fully controllable. Meaning only exists because not everything can be controlled. Sometimes, getting what you didn't want will make your life better.
The upsides of unpredictability: Either things turn out right, or they don't. Even wrong things become good experiences or good stories—wonderful things may happen, or you'll at least have good anecdotes.

Action and Completion

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The art of imperfect action: Your time is limited, and you can't choose all possible paths. Acknowledge your position in the kayak and not the superyacht. Baby steps and decisions are fine, but they must be real.
Finishing things means working through the messy reality. Most people like starting things but find finishing them torturous due to the imperfect mess.
We may think a new endeavor will be better, but we just haven't seen its mess yet. Every project will be a mess.
If you never finish things, you never feel a sense of accomplishment. Leaving things unfinished leaves you feeling sluggish. Finishing things gives you energy and makes you feel better.
Do it and then be done with it. If you're writing a difficult email, sit down and finish it; don't let it linger. Add it to your "done" list so you can move on. Completion is only a temporary stressful event, freeing up the rest of your time.
If you want to be good at something, do it often—e.g., daily, where one mistake won't ruin everything. Make constant (imperfect) progress; don't be a self-punishing perfectionist.

Work, Focus, and Limits

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Think about whether all those checkboxes in your productivity system actually help you accomplish what you want in life. What is your purpose?
Limit yourself to 3–4 hours of intense focus as a knowledge worker. Break it into two 90-minute and one 1-hour period daily. Intense focus consumes more energy; limiting this time keeps it manageable and less intimidating. Accept that the remaining hours will be full of life's normal chaos. You won't have enough energy for more focused work, and you'll save the rest of your day for other things.
Rest and mood are essential for good work.
The person with the most sustainable work habits gets more done in the long run than the one who overworks and forces intense focus for too many hours each day.
The work is never done, so you have to stop anyway—not because everything is finished, but because you must stop. Despite knowing there's still work, you need to stop.

Attitude Toward Problems and Challenges

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Develop a taste for problems. We will never reach a trouble-free life; there is always something. Don't resign yourself, but remember that new problems will always arise.
Would you really want a life with no problems? Obstacles make life worth living. The greatest obstacles can be devastating, but the small and medium ones are like the little battles that make life interesting.
Aim not for a life with no problems, but for a life with more interesting ones. Beyond every mountain, there will always be more mountains.

Simplicity and Overcomplication

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Don't overcomplicate things, like planning a child's birthday party. It's not that difficult; get pizza, ice cream, and balloons. The real challenge would be screwing it up.

Interactions with Others and Emotional Boundaries

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Get things done by not being mean to yourself. How would you like to spend your day today?
Other people's negative emotions belong to them. Allow others to have them, even if they're disappointed by your work (into which you put so much effort).
Other people have their own problems; they aren't constantly thinking bad thoughts about you.
If others are angry at you, it's their problem, not yours. However, don't adopt an "I don't care" mentality to the extent that you become a jerk.
If someone is upset because you're not behaving as they wish, that's not your problem. While they are angry, you're free to feel otherwise. Whether or not you react is a separate matter. Every decision carries trade-offs.
Often, people act on a sense of urgency. But you can decide not to respond solely for their sake; they must deal with their own emotional weather. Some items are urgent, but are they really as urgent as they seem? Sometimes, we act just to avoid others getting angry.
People-pleasing is not an effective way to actually please people. Focus on your own priorities.
The sense of urgency—that if you don't hurry, someone may get angry—might not be in your best interest. Their feelings don't have the magic power to force you to react. Sympathy is fine, but there's no reason to constantly please others.
Saying no to something may be the best thing you can do for everyone involved.

Dealing With Interruptions

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Free writing: If you don't know what to write, just write about that, with no standards.
During deep focus, interruptions can be especially frustrating—especially if you meditate beforehand to get in the groove. On a larger scale, your whole life can be seen as a series of interruptions. Treat these not as distractions, but as open opportunities for awareness and creativity. Deep focus is not the default human state; monks spend years training for it. You should still have boundaries, but deal with interruptions naturally. If a child storms in—deal with the new reality. It will be much more pleasant for everyone.

Living in the Present and Deferred Gratification

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There's always the perception that the "real thing" is coming in the future, but the real thing is now. This is it—the real thing is not in the future but in the present. The past is gone, and the future does not exist yet. Show up as fully as possible now.
Of course, make plans for the future, but don't live there all the time.
Don't take your life too seriously, always preparing for the future (the "provisional life"). Don't defer gratification to the extreme. It's not that concern for your future self is bad; setting goals is a way to become more immersed in the present moment and have an absorbing life.
Sabbatical: Take it now, not in the future, because you may not be there later.
Learn to defer gratification less.
Spend time on what matters to you most, immediately. Thirty minutes well spent now is more valuable than hundreds of hours theorizing about spending time.

Operating from Sanity and Mentoring

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Renegotiate commitments (e.g., extend deadlines, pull out of projects, or avoid new commitments) to restore sanity and rebalance your time.
A to-do list is a menu to pick tasks from, not something you must complete entirely before allowing yourself to rest.
Mentoring includes making the mentor's flaws visible so that the mentee realizes they are not alone with their imperfections. Otherwise, mentees may become anxious by comparing their insides to the mentor's outsides.

Letting Go

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We make ourselves more miserable than necessary by holding onto how we want things to be.
It's nice to collect memories, but the way to do it is by fully living experiences—rather than forcing the effort to collect them.

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