From 5b2deaa0e51468a04a3c7c72ad8e5181a8e804e2 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Paul Buetow Date: Sun, 28 May 2023 00:01:27 +0300 Subject: Update content for html --- notes/never-split-the-difference.html | 46 +++++++++++++++++------------------ 1 file changed, 23 insertions(+), 23 deletions(-) (limited to 'notes/never-split-the-difference.html') diff --git a/notes/never-split-the-difference.html b/notes/never-split-the-difference.html index 6f69a8e0..99bb0481 100644 --- a/notes/never-split-the-difference.html +++ b/notes/never-split-the-difference.html @@ -16,14 +16,14 @@ 
          ,..........   ..........,
-     ,..,'          '.'          ',..,
-    ,' ,'            :            ', ',
-   ,' ,'             :             ', ',
-  ,' ,'              :              ', ',
- ,' ,'............., : ,.............', ',
-,'  '............   '.'   ............'  ',
- '''''''''''''''''';''';''''''''''''''''''
-                    '''
+     ,..,'          '.'          ',..,
+    ,' ,'            :            ', ',
+   ,' ,'             :             ', ',
+  ,' ,'              :              ', ',
+ ,' ,'............., : ,.............', ',
+,'  '............   '.'   ............'  ',
+ '''''''''''''''''';''';''''''''''''''''''
+                    '''

Tactical listening, spreading empathy


@@ -33,7 +33,7 @@
Mirror training is like Jedi training. Simple but effective. A mirror needs space. Be silent after "you want this?"

@@ -47,33 +47,33 @@
  • Detect and label the emotions of others for your powers.
  • To be understood seems to solve all problems magically.

    • -Try: to put a label on someone's emotion and then be silent. Wait for the other to reveal himself. "You seem unhappy about this?"
    +Try: to put a label on someone's emotion and then be silent. Wait for the other to reveal himself. "You seem unhappy about this?"

    More tips




    "No" starts the conversation



    -When the opponent starts with a "no", he feels in control and comfortable. That's why he has to start with "no".
    +When the opponent starts with a "no", he feels in control and comfortable. That's why he has to start with "no".


    -Get a "That's right" when negotiating. Don't get a "you're right". You can summarise the opponent to get a "that's right".
    +Get a "That's right" when negotiating. Don't get a "you're right". You can summarise the opponent to get a "that's right".

    Win-win



    -Win-win is a naive approach when encountering the win-lose counterpart, but always cooperate. Don't compromise, and don't split the difference. We don't compromise because it's right; we do it because it is easy. You must embrace the hard stuff; that's where the great deals are.
    +Win-win is a naive approach when encountering the win-lose counterpart, but always cooperate. Don't compromise, and don't split the difference. We don't compromise because it's right; we do it because it is easy. You must embrace the hard stuff; that's where the great deals are.

    On Deadlines



    @@ -99,15 +99,15 @@
    ...then put an extreme anker.

    -You always have to embrace thoughtful confrontation for good negotiation and life. Don't avoid honest, clear conflict. It will give you the best deals. Compromises are mostly bad deals for both sides. Most people don't negotiate a win-win but a win-lose. Know the best and worst outcomes and what is acceptable for you.
    +You always have to embrace thoughtful confrontation for good negotiation and life. Don't avoid honest, clear conflict. It will give you the best deals. Compromises are mostly bad deals for both sides. Most people don't negotiate a win-win but a win-lose. Know the best and worst outcomes and what is acceptable for you.

    Calibrated question



    Calibrated questions. Give the opponent a sense of power. Ask open-how questions to get the opponent to solve your problem and move him in your direction. Calibrated questions are the best tools. Summarise everything, and then ask, "how I am supposed to do that?". Asking for help this way with a calibrated question is a powerful tool for joint problem solving

    -Being calm and respectful is essential. Without control of your emotions, it won't work. The counterpart will have no idea how constrained they are with your question. Avoid questions which get a yes or short answers. Use "why?".
    +Being calm and respectful is essential. Without control of your emotions, it won't work. The counterpart will have no idea how constrained they are with your question. Avoid questions which get a yes or short answers. Use "why?".

    -Counterparts are more involved if these are their solutions. The counterpart must answer with "that's right", not "you are right". He has to own the problem. If not, then add more why questions.
    +Counterparts are more involved if these are their solutions. The counterpart must answer with "that's right", not "you are right". He has to own the problem. If not, then add more why questions.


    Slow.... it.... down....

    -- cgit v1.2.3